Title: Moldywarts and the Harrowing Decision
Author: Alexa Deimos and Cassandra Riley
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Neither of us created Harry Potter, we just have a lot of fun making stuff up about him.
Moldywarts and the Harrowing Decision
“Right,” Dolohov said. “Not Yellow Devils and not Super Skulls. We need a good name!”
“What about Hell-bent Homicidals?” asked Rosier enthusiastically, knocking over his mug of coffee.
“No, no. Too long,” Lucius muttered, tapping his cane insistently against his chair.
They were sitting around a table in the Hog’s Head, sipping various beverages and arguing persistently. A little way away, Moldywarts (as they secretly called him) sat muttering to himself agitatedly.
“Now what’s he complaining about?” Rookwood grumbled, receiving a kick under the table from Lucius.
“Oh, he’s on about that prophecy again,” Dolohov supplied. “I’m off to the bar. Drinks, anyone?”
“I’ll have a Firewhiskey,” called Rodolphus Lestrange, draining his glass. “And that’s an idea. Why don’t we call ourselves the ‘Fire Eaters’??”
“Too conspicuous,” complained Lucius, rolling his eyes irritably.
“Why don’t you suggest something then?” demanded Bellatrix, who was becoming impatient.
“Death Eaters!” Rosier shouted, and in his excitement, knocked over a bottle of Butterbeer that sloshed all over Bellatrix, who screeched and sent the salt shaker flying, only to hit Moldywarts on the head.
Moldywarts shrieked in anger, and all his followers fell deathly silent. He brandished his wand, still screaming madly, and killed stone-dead the first moving thing he saw, which just so happened to be a gerbil. Satisfied, Moldywarts stowed his wand away and sat down quite normally as though nothing had happened.
Gradually, his followers began to talk in hushed voices.
“You idiot, Rosier!” Lucius snapped.
“Sorry, sorry,” Rosier insisted, “but I really think it’s a good name.”
“What, ‘Death Eaters’?” Bellatrix sneered, dabbing at her damp clothes.
“What about…Corpse Crunchers?” Pettigrew, who was new to the rank, suggested timidly.
The table quietened, and everyone gazed thoughtfully into space.
“Corpse Crunchers,” Dolohov repeated. “I am Antonin Dolohov, and I am a Corpse Cruncher… I quite like it.”
Pettigrew flushed proudly, while Rosier sat back in his chair and sulked.
“I think it’s a ridiculous name,” Lucius said, disliking Pettigrew all the more. “It sounds like something out of Star Wars.”
“What’s Star Wars?” they asked, confused.
“Erm,” Lucius said, averting his eyes. “Nothing,” he muttered.
“Well, I disagree,” Rodolphus disagreed. “It’s new, it’s interesting, and no one is going to forget it.”
“Well no one is going to forget the ‘Fellowship of the Ring’, either, but we’re not going to call ourselves that,” Rosier muttered.
He received several odd looks. Everyone then jumped and turned, as Moldywarts leapt up and exclaimed, “That’s it! No wait, no…” he sat down again, absently petting the dead gerbil.
The followers let out a sigh of relief.
“What about… ‘The Prophesiers’?” Alecto Carrow suggested.
“I thought we’d decided on Corpse Crunchers,” Pettigrew squeaked.
“I actually rather do like Death Eaters as well,” Dolohov added as an afterthought.
“Alright, alright,” interrupted Lucius. “Let’s have a vote. Death Eaters or Corpse Crunchers?”
In the end, the vote came to a tie. Half of them wanted Death Eaters and the other half preferred Corpse Crunchers.
“Let’s ask our leader,” someone piped up.
They agreed and Dolohov stood up.
“My Lord,” he called. “We need your counsel.”
Moldywarts heaved a sigh and turned to face them. Dolohov continued.
“Which name do you prefer, my Lord? Death Eaters, or Corpse Crunchers?”
Moldywarts stared at him incredulously. “I care not!” he snapped.
“But, my Lord!” Rosier exclaimed. “As your followers we need a name. To spread fear, so to speak.”
“And Corpse Crunchers is going to spread fear?” Lucius snapped, one eyebrow raised.
“Well, I…” Rosier faltered, and he examined his fingernails.
“Fine, fine,” Moldywarts interrupted. “I pick the last one alphabetically.”
His followers stared at him. “My Lord?”
“You heard my decision, now bugger off!”
Rosier grinned happily, bouncing in his seat and trying not to stick his tongue out childishly at Pettigrew. “Death Eaters it is,” he declared.
Later, when the decision had been decided, Bellatrix muttered, “You know, we could’ve mixed the two: Corpse Eaters.”
“Too late now,” Lucius sighed. “We’re Death Eaters for all eternity. How depressing.”
-
